Very strange feeling around here. I drive in with an overwhelming feeling of familiarity and positive emotion, as memories and picture run across my mind in a split second. Thinking about how this town has shaped me, grown me and been the home of my college years and growing up as a woman and also how I am about to pack everything up and say goodbye.
As cliché as they say, life is one hundred percent seasonal. One stage of life sets in while the next chapter is preparing itself, only to be placed into forward motion to one day knock you off of your feet and bring you into the next season. We were always taught this when we were little and even anticipate it as adults but one can never really prepare for the transition.
Yes, we have all experienced many transitions in life- how in the world did we grow from that baby into the independent individual? My point exactly. But the strangest thing is that no matter the number of times we go through a transition and all of its components, with every transition that greets us, we are never fully prepared for the emotions it brings out.
I’ll completely speak for myself here…. I am independent and have made “the move” before when I decided to go to Alabama for college. I took the plunge and was blessed completely with friends and a great niche. These past four years have been a cultivation of something much greater than an identity or home but rather a human experience that shows the full potential of adaptability…. Which brings me to my point.
Thinking about chapters, seasons or whatever you would like to call them, they all have some of the similar components in regards to change. But I think what makes a truly successful season or chapter is the ability to adapt to it. What I mean is, choosing to be present in it. Actively committing to every notion and thought, every feeling and every encounter… with the people, places, things, the beautiful and the ugly, the comfortable and the irritating.
This is where the beauty lies because there is no formula to follow. I mean you could try and devise one but as we know, each individual chapter and season is different. There is never going to be a situation in life where all of the elements are going to be the same… and if they are it still wont be the same because you will more than likely be a different person the second time around. More developed and cultured if you ask me.
So with this season in my life that is coming to a bitter sweet close, I have to say it was a successful journey. I believe it was a four year process of adaptation, resulting in the fact that this is now the place that I call home.
These four walls of my home have seen and shared a lot with the lives that have left and re-entered. A history that can only be told through those that were here creating it or through pictures that help us remember the youth of a new season and how it has grown us.
I think there is so much beauty in photography- any type- because it makes a fair attempt at capturing a moment in time. Life gets so busy and blurry that our memories forget the tangible sentiments that a frame can capture. I am grateful for all of the silly pictures Emma and I have taken over the years. It keeps us laughing and crying together. It offers something that can never be erased.
I am looking around my room and I can’t even see to my TV because there are boxes stacked everywhere. This has already kicked the transition into full motion for me because my house no longer feels like a home. And this is where it is bitter sweet.
I am bursting with wonder and anticipation for my permanent residence in Atlanta and my life there. It has been a long time coming and I am ready to be with some of my dearest friends who have been geographically distant from me. I am trading the best four years of my life for another stage that will continue to be the best whatever months or years of my life. I am convinced this is what God has for me. The Best.
Which brings me to my common denominator at the moment. Through the laughter, excitement, anticipation, tears, sorrow, and nostalgia, it all relates back to an overall state of heart for me: grateful. Utterly and undeservingly so but nonetheless grateful.
